The best replacement for stewie is lois.

The best alternatives to stewie are rated as following:
★★★★★  lois
★★★★★  brian
★★★★  bertram
★★  cartman
★★  mr rogers
★★  dexter
★★  evil stewie
★  maggie
★  chucky
★  bart
★  rallo
  evil monkey
  roger
  shatner
  mr. rogers

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stewie
lois
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